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What the F Is Artistry

 

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Headlines

  • Larisa Latynina has a previously undiscovered worlds medal that ties her with Simone on the all-time medal list!
  • Constant vigilance news about the volunteer assistant coach at Southern Utah

Gymternet News

  • It’s the Paris Challenge Cup this weekend! We discuss
    • Why are so many more gymnasts going to Paris than to Szombathely or Mersin, and is it because of The Devil Wears Prada?
    • The highly anticipated return of Melanie De Jesus Dos Santos. What should we expect?
    • The pre-worlds showdown between the Brazilians and the US
    • Will Jade Carey upgrade her floor tumbling?
    • And much more!

Artistry Code Class

  • The beam and floor Artistry Checklists explained.
  • Why you’re supposed to party like it’s 1979
  • Sideways movements and close-to-beam choreography
    • What kinds of fake choreography aren’t good enough, how many body parts have to touch the beam to count, and what counts as a body part
    • A deep discussion of fairy dust and whether the distribution of the aforementioned fairy dust can be legally classified as sufficient involvement of all the body parts
  • Chicken isolations: A no-no
  • What is posture and how do you know whether your posture is enough posture
  • Why smiling is the same as elite dead eyes
  • Why you should cut off everything but your feet

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